Wednesday, 6 July 2011

Cortical Soliloquy

Hello.

If you can see this, it means that they have managed to understand my EEG signals and interpret what I'm trying to say.

No, I'm not dead yet; I'm most definitely not lying somewhere in a vegetative state.

That would imply I had a body to lie about in.

All I am now is an eye and a brain.

Seems like that's all they could save. For now.

You would think that at this time and age, they would have perfected this.

Well it is sort of perfect, just not perfect enough.

Still took them this long to figure out what I'm thinking.

Obviously they don't know how to talk to me yet.

But I can sort of read lips, only if they are speaking English.

Sometimes I wonder why I thought this was a good idea.

I know, intellectual and all, but I need my body damn it!

Kinda funny just being... here and thinking... and nothing else.

I can't even scratch my nose, which is itching like mad.

Could have sworn that my legs were numb, but it's not really possible. I don't have a body now!

So this is how being bedridden feels like; except I'm missing my damn body.

If not for this eye, I doubt I can stay awake. Hard to think when I can't see anything.

That silence is deafening. Weird to not hear a thing, not even that tinnitus thing.

I don't know how long I have been here, days? Months? Years?

I can't really sleep unless the lights are completely turned off, which they have not done so in a while. Strangely enough, I don't get headaches, not because I don't really have a head, but... I don't know.

I'm not a neurosurgeon after all.

Hm, the lights are flickering. That does not seem right.

Damn it! They are gone! Did they switch it off?

Something's not right, I can't see anymore!

What is going on now?

Help! Help! Help!

Stupid. How can they hear me?

Maybe the circulatory system is dead. Power failure?

I wonder how long more before I slip into an unconsciousness?

Damn scientists...