Monologue

I can tolerate this no longer. It has been too long, far too long since the last time that I had gone out with anyone. It's not like I'm some kind of pervert or lascivious fellow, but a man has got his wants, his needs. I've been celibate for too long to the point I've forgotten just how beguiling it is the female can be, and how alluring she can make herself become if she knows that you want something from her, something that is hard to get from anyone else, that little thing called intimacy. And it doesn't even have to be penetrative sex, just a close bare body massage of some sort, the way her fingers rub through the muscular knots of the shoulders, the way her skin and flesh gently give way to the softest of touch.

I know it is sounding like a rant. I cannot help it. I met that woman. Her. She looked a lot like my ex, sounded almost the same, and if I hadn't known better I would have seriously had to consider that the crazy bitch that was my ex had a twin, or was somehow planning some kind of revenge against me for dumping her crazy ass because she was nuts enough to stalk me with the intention of maiming me.

That's right, I swore of going out with anyone because of a psycho-bitch of an ex. But I don't want to talk about that now, I want to talk about this woman I met. She was a looker, talks real fine too, smart and witty, full of zest, hidden tiger. I didn't make the first move---she did. Pounced on me, almost literally, during that one night that we were out in the park enjoying the muggy weather that the tropics had to offer. I had to push her off me reluctantly; I couldn't bring myself to do anything with her, not right then anyway. I apologised to her, and somehow, she said something to the effect of being understanding. And now when I'm finally back home and sitting down in front of the television set that was not turned on, I suddenly realised just what the hell I did.

I had probably blown it. It had been so long since I got together with a woman, and this time, she actually wanted it and was aggressive enough to go for it. And what did I do? I acted like a pussy, just pushing her aside, as though I were so afraid of a little intimacy.

But now, I think I straightened out my mind. Time to give her a call and see how things go. It can't get any worse, right?